Question Submitted: How To Move Past Friendly To Flirty - Confidence Is Key

It can be unnerving to talk to your crush, that’s not uncommon.

Let’s face it: Nothing’s more paralyzing than fear, especially when it comes to talking with your crush. 

How hard is that to do?

Good news for you - your crush is actually flirting with you which means they’re interested! (Yay!) Now that the flirtation door is open, walk through. You want to think, how long will this door be open?

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Maybe not forever, and they may decide you’re not interested unless… they see at least some interested and reciprocation on your end.

While it can feel terrifying to talk with your crush, you want to remember that the door is already open. They’re literally flirting with you! So, as far as dealing with your crush there’s little more you need to “do” other than just stop doing the brushing-off part.

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You may have been spending time talking, texting and doing fun things together “as friends,” so moving toward something more meaningful can feel exciting, but also make you feel nervous. A pretty good hint that can reveal how you truly feel toward someone is when they reach out.

If it feels like Christmas when your phone alert goes off and you reach for your device hoping it’s them with some random, witty comment then yeah, you’re probably into them.

On the flip side, one way to gauge how they’re feeling about you is to take inventory of the way they communicate with you, as well as their behavior toward you. Someone who is interested in a relationship with you romantically will make a noticeable effort to maximize their time with you. This means they’re going to be talkative, kind, validating and yes, they’ll be flirting with you.

While it’s humbling to just go with it, because this means you’re no longer keeping the secret of your feelings hidden securely within your heart, if you don’t open up to the flirting by (stopping) just brushing it off, then he may eventually assume you’re just not interested.

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Here’s some Action Steps that may help you.

You’ve got to get your confidence out of it’s proverbial box, untie the bow on top and take off the lid to set it free.

• What am I afraid of by opening myself up? He’s already shown interest so the worst possible scenario would be that you’ve somehow misinterpreted his intentions which is pretty unlikely.
• Am I really interested in this relationship? Clearly your answer is leaning toward “yes.”
• What might a relationship with this person look like? Consider how your connection may feel going from casual to committed.
• After all of the above is considered, how do I feel about the prospect of a relationship? Really give yourself a minute to mull over the relationship possibilities and how you feel about each other.

Once you’ve decided to shake the fear and move toward actual romance (as in, having a date or few) then you’ll likely think back on the whole experience and be glad that you empowered yourself with confidence and moved forward.

I hope this helps! xo